1) As
stereotypical as it sounds, the French really do eat a lot of baguettes. There
is a boulangerie on every corner selling perfect baguettes (crunchy crust,
fluffy filling and golden in colour) for less than a euro. Hardly a day goes by
when I don’t eat a baguette and we even have a chart in our flat to document
our baguette consumption. I’m dreading returning home and having to settle for
Hovis thickly sliced.
2) Another
stereotype that has proven to be perfectly true is that France is the home of
cheese. I didn’t realise how many different types of cheese existed until I saw
the shelves and shelves of the stinky stuff in the supermarket; comtés, tommes,
roqueforts – the list is endless. What amazes me, however, is that despite the
hundreds of cheeses on offer, I’m yet to find any cheddar. I now have to settle
for sprinkling my pasta dishes with grated emmental which is like replacing
cadbury’s with supermarket’s own: bland and disappointing.
3) Stereotype
number three (there seems to be a pattern here…) is that wine is the only thing
worth drinking. It’s absolutely delicious and you can pick up a decent
bottle from your local supermarket for around 3€. What many people don’t know,
however, is that although France arguably has the best wine, it certainly has
the worst! Their cheap wine is ten times worse than anything I’ve got on offer
in ASDA, stay away!
4) Something
that the fashion conscious may already be aware of but of which I was ignorant
before arriving here, is that the French don’t wear any colours. Their
wardrobes are made up of black, grey, dark blue and more black. Since realising
this I’ve slowly stopped wearing my fun, bright t-shirts and am now the proud owner of three pairs of black jeans in the hope of blending in and becoming chic!
5) As
a waitress, I am very passionate about customer service and get very annoyed if
I’m served by someone grumpy back in the UK – waiters should be happy! That
said, I’ve had to abandon this ideal here, as the French have never heard the
phrase ‘service with a smile’ and I’m not even sure they know what customer
service is. This particularly grates on me as they expect a tip quand même.
6) From
disinterested servers to far too interested suitors. English guys have got a
bad reputation when it comes to the ladies but I have to say that in comparison
to some of the types I’ve met here you English lads are absolute gentlemen. The
French men don’t seem to comprehend clear phrases like ‘go away’ or ‘I’m
not interested’, so now I just resort to firmly shouting ‘non’ over and over
again until they give up. I always dreamt of finding myself a suave, French
husband but somehow I don’t think it’s going to happen.
7) Another
group of people who are much better in England than in France are the teachers.
Working in a school here has made me realise that I definitely don’t want to
put my future (though now highly unlikely) bilingual children through the
French education system. Here, teachers manhandle the children, shout constantly
at them and seem to live for their two-hour lunchtimes. At first, I wondered why
the kids like me so much, but in comparison to their teachers I’m a saint.
8) Now,
the French have this famous laissez-faire attitude to life; they go with the
flow and are very laid back about plans, timings etc. But for such a relaxed
country they don’t half love bureaucracy: it takes days, if not weeks, to sort
out any kind of paperwork and they are sticklers for details. I have been lucky
to have friends doing the same forms as me but if you’re attempting anything
alone…bon courage.
9) I’ve
always had to use public transport as I only recently passed my driving test
and in the UK this is a nightmare – late trains, a bus once every half an hour
and paying £6 return to the city centre. Here, life’s a dream. I have a navigo
which costs 70€ a month (we’re supposed to get half of that reimbursed but
y’know…it’s taking some time), this gives me unlimited transport by train and
bus and it’s as simple as that. Everything is always on time and incredibly
frequent – I now sigh in frustration if I have to wait 5 minutes for a train
instead of 2.
10) This last point
baffles me; the French seem to know we’re English. Before we open our mouths to
speak, 9 times out of 10, we get “‘ello, ‘ow can I ‘elp?”. What gives us away?! Is it something
about the way we look? Even though I’ve taken great pains to wear only black.
Is it that we’re so smiley? Regardless, I insist on replying
in French and answering their “vous parlez français?” with a confident “bah
ouais, bien sûr” which always throws them. I’m determined that by the end of
the year I will stop giving off this ‘English’ vibe and convince everyone I’m French with my undeniable Frenchyness.
I hope this was slightly informative and vaguely interesting. Next week's blog will be up on Monday as my family are visiting me this weekend *incredibly excited squealing* and I won't have time to write it. I know, quel dommage!
Bisous à tous xxx
No comments:
Post a Comment